I am a single mother and Uni and when on a placement, I have only $80 left for groceries. I have a casual on call job but need something more reliable that will let me have up to 12 weeks off a year (yeah that is going to happen) so that I can go on my placements and sit exams. Both my children are at school now, but study part time as I am locked into part time study.

I recall one time when at a BBQ where I was chatting to people when another person comes over and asks if my children are at their dads on the weekend because they wanted to organise a play date. The person I had been talking to said “You! a single mother? I wouldn’t have picked it, you don’t look like or sound like one!” Um what are we supposed to look like or talk like? We are regular people. Media have a lot to answer for.

Thanks Ruth, you might be interested to read our previous survey results on parents who are studying: https://www.mothershelpers.co.nz/parents-studying-seek-support

I have just published the numbers but not all the comments or analysed the survey yet so some interesting discussion to come out of that I’m sure!

Thanks for your comments, yes, it makes no sense to me that they are wanting women to return to work but not supporting the process for them to do so. The Training Incentive Allowance will cover courses that will (if you’re lucky to get a job out of it) have you in a job on the minimum wage. It’s not really releasing you from poverty at all.

Vicky, what a credit to you and your parenting despite the challenges you faced! I can imagine how proud you are of them, and how you feel everything you’ve done for them really was worth it in the end.

Thanks Rachel. Congratulations on your ‘lovely new partner’ 🙂 However, it’s times like these that I, as a single parent, look to my future and realise that without a partner with wages as they are and with a child to think of that I’m raising, it’s unlikely we’ll ever really and truly “get ahead” without my having a partner. It doesn’t seem right to me that in 2014 women still have to have a partner in order to be financially secure. Although it is (in part) my choice to work in the social work field that – like any helping profession – is not well paid 🙂

Thank you for your comment Paula, I wholeheartedly agree.

Nikki, thank you for sharing this with me, it is a privilege to read your story and I want you to know that, yes, I get it! I know how hard it is and the worry and anxiety that goes along with the responsibilities you are shouldering. Right now you are doing the most important job of all: focusing on the care of your children and they are getting valuable mummy-time. There is nothing more precious than that, and ultimately, it’s what our kids want from us more than anything – our time. Make sure you are taking some time out for yourself though and if we can help you with your depression and support you, we’d be happy to do that – hit the “request help” button 🙂 x

Kylie, I applaud you and I am in absolute awe of your tenacity and determination to make a better life for you and your kids. The courage it has taken to change the script with all that has gone against you through no fault of your own (rape, abusive ex) is immense. Congratulations on being an inspiration to your children who will always remember this courage and spirit about you and love you for it even though they don’t always understand the choices you’ve had to make right now. Hold your head up high, girl, you’re an inspiration to me! Kia kaha.

Kristina